Teaching your child the concept of stranger safety and giving her strategies for handling situations with strangers can help make her less vulnerable. It’s not a once in a lifetime conversation. Here are four key issues that may create safety challenges: Hyperactivity: Kids who are hyperactive might try to keep quiet, as they’ve been taught—even when their gut tells them something’s wrong. They may mistake a situation as safe when it isn’t. The My Child Safety website identifies offering candy and asking for help finding a lost animal as the two most common ruses strangers use to approach children 2. In fact, the idea of stranger danger is vastly overblown: The majority of child abductions and sexual abuse cases are committed not by strangers, but by people in a child’s life — and most missing children are not kidnapped but have run away from home. If you were to discourage your child from trusting anyone she doesn’t know, she likely wouldn’t be able to form relationships with the people offering the services she needs. That’s why consent is the most important concept kids need to protect themselves from a wide range of bad situations: Children have control over and responsibility for their own bodies. Your child may find discussions about stranger safety to be scary, but there are ways to help conversations go more smoothly. An adult has no business approaching a child in a car and asking them for help finding a lost pet, or offering them candy, or claiming a mysterious emergency. It’s something you consistently do with your child. stress and But is it really the most effective abduction prevention lesson for our children? companies. But the response to anyone who tries to push a child into a situation that feels wrong — from a stranger on the street to a friend’s older brother — is the same: Get away and tell a trusted adult.Â. Once you and your child have talked over the basics, you can start explaining how predators operate. Get the best of Fatherly in your inbox, Teaching a kid about “stranger danger” isn’t as simple as telling them strangers are bad and calling it a day. At school, learning specialists might work with them in separate classrooms for one-on-one instruction. This has been a common method used with the good intention of keeping children safe. Act Out Stranger Danger.  — Kids need to understand that they control who can and cannot touch their bodies, and they can leave when a situation feels wrong. Depending on her issues, teaching your child about stranger safety may be complicated. That’s why. “Stranger Danger”: Children’s Distrust of Men May Outweigh Information Accuracy psychologicalscience.org - Psychological Science. Why “Stranger Safety” Can Be Tricky for Kids Who Learn and Think Differently. Then tell … Having certain challenges may make them more vulnerable than their peers and less likely to understand and follow the rules of stranger safety. The phrase “Don’t talk to strangers,” and the many instructions given to children to avoid strangers at all times … Many pediatricians and doctors will make a note to mention how kids are the “boss” of their bodies at each annual physical exam. First the obvious. trouble picking up on social cues might not be able to read the body language of the person they’re talking to. Ask them what they think a stranger looks like and then correct any misperceptions. Offenders can look like anyone — A third of abuse perpetrated against minors is committed by another minor; 10 … Make her feel heard, validate her feelings and then look into what happened. Specific issues like impulsivity and trouble picking up on social cues can make dealing with strangers complicated. It’s common for children to think that “bad strangers” look scary, like the villains in cartoons. The Pandemic Will Change the Way Today's Kids Grow Up. Copyright © 2014–2020 Understood For All Inc. All rights reserved. For more  — A third of abuse perpetrated against minors is committed by another minor; 10 percent of offenders are female. This is not only not true, but it’s dangerous for children to think this way. The "stranger-danger" message is not effective, as danger to children is much greater from someone you or they know than from a "stranger." When teaching about stranger safety, it’s also important to keep your child’s emotions in mind. “Pretty” strangers can be just as dangerous as the “not-so-pretty” ones. It can be difficult to keep your kids completely safe online. and are used with permission. Kids with learning and thinking differences can be at greater risk for a number of reasons. Yell 'HELP' or 'I DON'T KNOW YOU' to get someone's attention. Don't be afraid to say 'NO' to a stranger. To start the conversation about strangers, discuss general safety with 2- and 3-year-olds. Yet, teaching “stranger danger” seems to have fallen out of favour, and I get it. How Do Kids Understand Race and Identity? “Understood” as used above includes Understood For All Inc., and their officers, affiliates, parents, and related entities, and their respective employees, contractors, or other personnel. While a stranger is someone that your child doesn't know, that doesn't mean that all strangers are to be feared. Their specific issues may also make them more vulnerable. Teaching kids about personal safety is as important as teaching them to read or write. Children often think a person is only unsafe if they have a rough appearance. From behaviour to bedtimes, school choices to screen time, this is the place to talk all things child-related. Time is of the essence during an emergency, so it's essential to have a solid family escape plan in place. How you talk about personal safety is important. Adapt these techniques to the age of your children Kids with learning and thinking differences may encounter many unfamiliar adults like doctors and therapists—so “stranger danger” lessons may be confusing. Not a stranger. We are better off teaching our children about consent and that no one should be touching them without their permission.”. … Start with basic body safety. If your child takes the initiative to tell you about something that made her uncomfortable, give her the benefit of the doubt. Get a handle on what your child thinks about strangers in order to address misconceptions. Give us a little more information and we'll give you a lot more relevant content, Oops! Explain the importance … The Better Way to Teach Stranger Danger Don’t accept rides from strangers — Adults have no business asking a child to get into their car. Impulsivity: Kids who are impulsive might not stop and think before answering a stranger’s questions. Practice what …  — When a child decides they don’t want to be touched, either in a tickle fight or when they meet Aunt Edna, parents need to respect that. Safety. Parents of older children can discuss current events or real situations to educate them about danger. Key Takeaways Kids with certain learning and attention are more vulnerable than other kids when it comes to staying safe. “Teaching them to trust their instincts and supporting their instincts — not letting other adults hug them or touch them against their will — will help them to better handle situations and report to you when such situations occur so an adult can intervene.”. Conditions. Meet and talk frequently with sports coaches and people who run activities your child is involved in. Listen to and trust your child when she mentions any uncomfortable interaction with an adult she does or doesn’t know. Instead, at Kidpower we talk about stranger safety. Explain to her that a stranger is anybody she doesn't know. “The best option is to teach children to trust their instincts in how to handle situations that make them feel uncomfortable — like what you do if you are at a friend’s house and someone there tries to touch you, or show you inappropriate material — and then role-play the situation with your child,” suggests Jeglic. Listen up. They need to be explicitly taught to identify a stranger, to know the potential dangers of talking to strangers and to act correctly if approached by a stranger. Knowing the adults in your child’s world and supplementing what his school teaches about stranger safety can keep her more secure. “Telling your child that strangers are dangerous can confuse her. Understanding her challenges can help you find the best way to deliver the message—and have it stick. In fact, the idea of stranger danger is vastly overblown: The majority of child abductions and, . Lexi Walters Wright Most adults your child interacts with, including the professionals who work with her, are strangers at first. Children should not learn to consider all strangers to be dangerous and everyone well-known to be safe. This website provides information of a general nature and is Deliver information in a way that is appropriate to age. Also, kids this age are not too young to learn the correct terms for their genitals and that it's … When you go out, ask them to stay close. But threats can come from anywhere — a third of abuse against minors is committed by minors, and 10 percent of sex offenders are female. Yikes! Explain to them that if a person tries to take them away, they need to do everything in their power to get away. Most adults your child interacts with, including the professionals who work with her, are strangers at first.”. Issues with speech and memory can also create obstacles to learning safety rules. 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